Dec 20, 2018

This is the front cover of my new book The Joy of Being Retired: 365 Reasons Why Retirement Rocks — and Work Sucks! It actually has 50 Bonus Reasons for Why Retirement Rocks — and Work Sucks! for a total of 415 Reasons. Each of the reasons has an accompanying cartoon image so this book is a little different than my two other bestselling retirement books. Just to let you know that the POD (Print on Demand) edition of The Joy of Being Retired is as of today available on and I just ordered 2 copies from

At, you can order a copy here:

The Joy of Being Retired on

At, you can order a copy here.

The Joy of Being Retired on

Heck, if you order a copy in the next 24 hours and pay for express shipping, you may get the copy before I get my 2 copies. I am also doing a print run of 1,700 copies of a traditional offset print run but these won't be available until the third week of January. (Two financial advisors have already ordered 200 copies each to give to their clients.)

To my special friends and clients, I will be giving you a complimentary signed copy or sending you a copy of the traditional offset print copy once I get them.

Oct 31, 2016

Best Retirement Planning Websites

A long time ago I learned from some of the top Internet marketing gurus such as Tom Antion that ugly websites can attract a lot more traffic and make a lot more money than professionally designed websites. (Of course website designers wanting to charge you thousands of dollars for a website that will be a total waste of money don't want you to know this.)

In June my "Retirement Cafe" website was the number 2 listing on "Top 55 Retirement Planning Websites" awards by 

Check out the number 2 listing on "Top 55 Retirement Planning Websites awards."

Incidentally, I designed the "Retirement Cafe" website using a cheap website design program that cost $175. I used that same program to design about 15 other websites, including the "Retirement Quotes Cafe". Not so long ago someone offered me $15,000 for the "Retirement Quotes Cafe" — I declined because I didn't want anyone messing around with the design. Ultimately, it's not how pretty the website looks that counts — it's the quality of the content that you have on the website that makes the difference and ends up making you the big money.

Furthermore in July the Washington Post mentioned the "Retirement Cafe" as one of the better websites in an article titled "Best web sites for boomers and retirees":

Again, I make the point that ugly websites can attract a lot more traffic and make a lot more money than professionally designed websites. The Washington Post states the "Retirement Cafe" is "Not as pretty and polished as some of the others, but packed with information and links . . ."

Incidentally, not that long ago Seth Godin, one to the top marketing gurus in the world, wrote a brief blog post about how pretty websites are often not as effective as the not-so-pretty (ugly) ones.

"Pretty websites ... are rarely websites that convert as well as unpretty ones . . . it's a mistake to also expect your pretty website to generate cash, to have the maximum percentage of clicks, to have the most efficient possible funnel of attention to action."

— Seth Godin

For the record, my ugly retirement websites are one of the major factors for my books How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free having sold over 300,000 copies and The Joy of Not Working having sold over 295,000 copies.

You can also check the Best Retirement Websites on the Retirement Cafe.

Nov 2, 2015

Things to Celebrate in October - Including Book Marketing

This October was the 35th anniversary of my being fired from my Engineering job for taking too much vacation. I have not had a regular job since then. These quotations apply:
"Hard work is no match for relaxed, creative action." 
— from The Lazy Person's Guide to Success 

 "Those who make the worst use of time most complain of its shortness." 
— Jean de La Bruyère 

 "Sometimes it’s important to work for that pot of gold. But other times it’s essential to take time off and to make sure that your most important decision in the day simply consists of choosing which color to slide down on the rainbow." 
— Douglas Pagels 

 "The work ethic is a terrible mistake — a cute term gone haywire. 
 — from "The Lazy Person’s Guide to Success" 

"If people knew what they had to do to be successful, most people wouldn't. "
— Lord Thomson of Fleet 

"If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain." 
— Dolly Parton

"If people knew how hard I worked to get my mastery, it wouldn't seem so wonderful at all." 
— Michelangelo

What's more, in late October I did a tally and realized that my books have now sold over 900,000 copies worldwide since I started self-publishing in September 1989. That’s an average of 34, 615 copies per year over 26 years. 
Still more, Book marketing guru John Kremer on Facebook said he was looking for more ideas for the new edition of his book “1,001 Ways to Market Your Books”. So I sent him a few of my marketing techniques — which I didn’t think he would use. Surprisingly (to me), he did a blog post about some of them:
Of course, sending John Kremer some of my marketing techniques is another marketing technique of mine to get me publicity in the new edition of his book. As it turns out, I got publicity on his blog post too. Some more words of wisdom:
"A master in the art of living draws no sharp distinction between his work and his play; his labor and his leisure; his mind and his body; his education and his recreation. He hardly knows which is which. He simply pursues his vision of excellence through whatever he is doing, and leaves others to determine whether he is working or playing. To himself, he always appears to be doing both." 
— Francoise Rene Auguste Chateaubriand

Jul 15, 2015

Did I Say That - Quotes by Ernie Zelinski

Just discovered this webpage (that I have nothing to do with).
Quotes by Ernie J. Zelinski
I didn't know that I said all of these things — or at least I forgot that I said some of them!

Here are a few more quotations by yours truly (Ernie Zelinski) to add to those on that webpage:
"Around some people it's best to keep quiet
about what we know.
Fools care little about wisdom and will
resent us for sharing it with them.
It's sort of silly to try to delight the undelightable,
wouldn't you say?"
— from Life's Secret Handbook 
"Don't tell the world your problems.
The world doesn't care about your problems.
Instead, tell the world all the great
blockbuster solutions you have
generated for all your problems."
— from Life's Secret Handbook 
"Before you climb over the side of the fence to
where the grass appears greener, try watering your
side first!"
— from The Lazy Person's Guide to Happiness 
"Where is this incredible expansive
energy called "high intention"?
There is no place that it is not if that
is where you are coming from."
— from Life's Secret Handbook (Reminders for Adventurous Souls Who Want to Make a Big Difference in This World)
 "Anything great that has been accomplished in the history of humanity has started with one small thought. We all have those thoughts; few people do anything with theirs, however. What do you intend to do with yours?"
— from Look Ma: Life’s Easy 
"There are two principles for creative success — one general and one definitive.
The general principle is that everyone has the ability to be creative and make a big difference in this world.
The definitive principle is that almost everyone has volunteered to be exempt from the general principle."
— from The Lazy Person's Guide to Success (over 110,000 copies sold)

"The best advice that anyone can give you for choosing a specific career is never to accept someone else's advice. Indeed, one of the biggest reasons for choosing the career you have chosen should be that no one told you to."
— from Career Success Without a Real Job
"Being unemployed is the true test of who you really are."
— from The Joy of Not Working
Also see Inspirational Quotes by Ernie Zelinski

Jun 15, 2013

The 777 Best Things Ever Said about Money

No doubt few things spice up an article, a book, a conversation, or a speech more than a well-chosen quotation. Given that money and prosperity are two of the most written and talked about subjects in Western society, there should be a book of inspirational and sensational quotations about prosperity and money. The 777 Best Things Ever Said about Money is the book!

Organized into over 110 categories for easy reference, this is the ultimate collection of the best things anyone ever said about prosperity and money. This classic book will resonate with professional speakers, journalists, writers, career coaches, life coaches, and connoisseurs of great quotations. It also makes great reading for just about everyone who is interested in money.

This book has it all: Wisdom. Ridicule. Irony. Sarcasm. Paradox. Nonsense. Comedy. Mockery. Social commentary. Valuable insight. All told, you will have in your possession the best things anyone ever said about money.

Better still,

Here are some of the quotations about money that you will encounter in the book:

“Where is your focus? On money or spirit?
Truth is, money is just a symbol. If you focus on the
energy it respresents, you will attract it.”
- Joe Vitale

"A bum came up to me and said,
“Can you lend lend me $20 until payday?”
I said “Sure, but when is payday?”
“He replied, "How the hell should I know?
You are the guy with the job!”
— Henny Youngman

“Keep your credit card
maxed out — so if you lose it,

no one can use it.”
— David Patterson, Host of CBC Radio's "The Debators"

“Whether we are from the meanest streets
in Detroit or the finest in Beverly Hills,
time and money will show us to be
fools or geniuses.”
— Jon Hanson

“I'm going to retire and live off my savings.
What I'll do the second day, I have no idea.”
— Unknown wise person

“If a man empties his purse into his head,
no man can take it away from him. An investment
in knowledge always pays the best interest.”
— Benjamin Franklin

“Aside from temporary setbacks and extraordinary
fortunes of inheritance or luck, if you want to
know how someone feels about himself or herself
— look at their bank account.”
— Darren Hardy

“Lethargy bordering on sloth remains
the cornerstone of our investment style.”
— Warren Buffet

“I love money. I love everything about it.
I bought some pretty good stuff. Got me a
$300 pair of socks. Got a fur sink. An electric
dog polisher. A gasoline powered turtleneck
sweater. And, of course, I bought
some dumb stuff, too.”
— Steve Martin

“Money may not buy happiness, but I'd rather
cry in a Jaguar than on a bus.”
— Françoise Sagan

“Looking in The Wall Street
Journal every day for a
"good investment" while
loaded with debt is like
lusting for salt while
dying of thirst.”
— Jon Hanson

Also see these resources for more quotes about money:

Money Quotes on Squidoo

Money Quotes on The Money Cafe

How Much Money Do I Need to Retire